8 Things Everyone Should Know
by Jackie Fine
March 2002

A friend once asked me to distill all the advice on romance I give into a quick tip. I said simply, love the other person. It's a verb, so act it out.

She said thank you and rolled her eyes at me with a sigh. I thought my advice sounded superb, and I could make this an easy email with that one basic and powerful idea. But rather than have all you rolling your eyes at me with a collective, "Gee, thanks Jackie," I've decided to open up the advice to 8 Basic Tips Everyone Should Know:

1. Make Your Partner Feel Good Outside The Bedroom.
Love your partner by looking for ways to make them feel good. All you sex lovers out there, take your mind from the bedroom (or kitchen counter, couch, wherever) for a second and try to expand your horizons.

I know I talk about sex a lot, but this time I'm talking about the little things - the unexpected actions that put an involuntary smile on your partner's face. Doing something nice for someone makes them feel good, which I promise will make you feel good.

2. Learn More About How To Please Your Partner.
OK, now something about sex. Take the time to read or watch videos together on improving your sex life and communications skills. Communication and sex are intimately tied, and pleasing your partner is a learned skill. Mere mating comes naturally, but truly understanding how to unify your partner's physical and emotional pleasure takes effort and education. So spend that time together and turn a tired routine into torrid romance.

3. Be Your Lover's Best Friend.
Be the person they tell their thoughts to, they share humorous stories with, they watch movies and read books with. Love doesn't preclude friendship. In fact, without it, love won't exist.

4. Pay Attention To What Your Partner Brings To The Relationship.
The reasons you love them rest on who they are and how they uniquely relate to you. Thank and acknowledge them for the beautiful differences they bring to your life and your experience. Vocal acknowledgment not only makes them feel good, but it reinforces and reminds you of why you love them.

5. Throw Some Variety Into Your Relationship.
Eat someplace new. If you like movies, go to a play. Make love in a different position, in a different room, in a different city. The point is to experience life in all it variations and to do it together.
r In The Middle Of The Day.
If they pop into your head, for whatever reason, call them. Tell them little thought that reminded you of them. Share with them your "highs" for the day. Don't get into the habit of only unloading the lows, because they'll become too much of a crutch for you, and nobody wants to see a frown all to time.

7. Don't Lose Sight Of The Importance Of Romance.
Take time to do the things you did when you first spent time together. I know I talked about variety, but here is a point where the same may be something good. Of course, if you're doing something romantic, most likely that in and of itself is a change when the rest of your day is occupied by the worries of the world: work, housecleaning, children, bills, etc.

8. Don't Let The Hollywood or the Media Define Your Relationship.
Every person is too unique to be generalized into a stereotype. Let what sets you apart from other couples be something you cultivate and enjoy. Live up to your standards and no one else's. Love like you love, not like you've been told to love.

I hope these eight tips can help explain somewhat what I mean when I say to love someone. It is an action, it takes some effort. No one can love by sitting still.
Don't focus on being in love, focus on loving. "Love" shouldn't describe your locations, it should describe your lifestyle.

The Media Source - PO Box 740653 - Houston, TX 77074-0653 USA
Telephone: (800) 874-6685 - Fax: (713) 339-8332 - Email
Contents © 2001-2003 The Media Source. All Rights Reserved.

About the Author:
For the past fourteen years, Jackie Fine has coupled her unique experience with information from  the American Institute for Human Abilities to create a revolutionary outlook on modern relationships.

See Jackie among other women whose ideas or products are represented on this site.

Visit Jackie at http://www.justaskjackie.com

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